Hate meal

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Every gay person knows (or should know) this golden, kitchen rule: Do not insult a gay man’s cooking.

I don’t understand what people gain from insulting others in front of other people at classy dinners. I’d made Greek rice (it has oregano herb in it) and some fucking twat calls it “ugali rice”. After he’d eaten heartily and it was mentioned that i cooked it, he turned ugly and insults my meal! I mean who does that?? Ugali is maize meal. It looks like white cake. They call it “paap” in South Africa. Rice are grains however. Mine had no such cake in it. It cooked evenly. I wonder what his problem was.

I smiled and watched what was on television, then shortly after stood to pour myself a drink and vent. I said, “you go to the American embassy for two hours and you come back with a fake accent?? SHAME!!”. It’s true, this man was putting up a facade because he had an American lover. He had this whole fake American accent going on. It pisses me off to see people do that! He’d never been to the states before so that was my conclusion, that he picked it up at the embassy. Or in the visa rejection letter.

I’ve lost respect for that fellow. He seemed like such a cool guy. I clearly overestimated him. He ought to know that when you insult someone's cooking, have the decency to do it outdoors when the chefs aren’t around.

I’m thankful i know the recipe for an orange martini. Light and sweet, a few glasses kept me company most of the evening. Apple Martinis too…

|Maybe-Asa|

Thoughts: The closet and Senior Management.

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“The closet is an institution designed to protect LGBT individuals from scorn and hatred; without that scorn and hatred, it would not exist. It exists.”

Felix Salmon from his blog article why I'm talking about Tim Cook’s personality. For those of you who didn’t know, Apple Inc. CEO Steve Jobs resigned this week. Tim Cook is now the new CEO of apple Inc., making him one of the most (if not already) powerful gay people on our lovely planet.

Personally i don’t see what all the noise about gay senior execs is. To me, they are equally capable persons who do the job well. It’s never about sexuality. It’s about how well you perform the job!
Hence the closet. It is none of anybody’s business about the gay executives lives! If the whole society knew the CEO or MD was gay, would it affect business? I can tell you that here in Kenya it would! In more developed countries like the USA it barely would, because they’ve got bills of human rights and privacy that work. Here in my country, at work, no matter how gay you are, if you’re in a senior position you don’t mention your sexuality. Why? I don’t know, you just don’t mention it! It would affect how people perceive your business. With the country being oh so “conservative”, it’s hard to do business with everyone knowing you’re gay.
Even if you’re a power queen lawyer, you live in a glass closet. Yes everyone can see you’re queer but don’t mention it, let them speculate.

From my perspective what goes on in the corporate world is a don’t ask don’t tell policy. If it’s been working, all well and good!
So yes people, Tim Cook is gay. Big deal! Life moves on. As long as they continue performing to and beyond standards, and delivering innovative products, I've got not problem with it at all.

Gay men & straight female musicians

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I saw this comment on a Barbra Streisand article on Advocate.com.

“Name: Rick
Date posted: 8/23/2011 11:45:58 AM
Hometown: Princeton, NJ
Comment:

I am going to keel over and die the day the Advocate runs an article like this on a performer who is actually gay and refers to them as a "gay icon." Gay men are the only group in the population that are still so self-hating that they don't celebrate their own kind the way other groups do, but rather live vicariously through another group of people, namely straight women. And these straight female "icons" are not infrequently disrespectful towards their worshipers: Streisand, herself, wanted to turn the film version of "The Normal Heart" into a vehicle for celebrating a woman doctor, with the gay men who are the focus of the play being relegated to "supporting" roles.......Sound familiar? It should--because it is exactly the role that the icon-worshiping gay man plays for these straight women, being their social accessories, their helpmates, their subordinates.....about as undignified and embarrassing a role as is imaginable.”

Personally i think the comment has valid truth! How many gay men worship Whitney Houston, Celine Dion, Beyonce, Kylie Minogue or Lady gaga? Look at my recent episode with Amy Winehouse’s death. What so you think about this? Do Lesbians have male icons? Is it because their vocals reach out to us gay men when we’re in various states and that their voices are sonorous/Aurally pleasing? Am i asking too many questions? Hmmmm…

|ice-Lights|

…On principles

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prin·ci·ple [prin-suh-puhl] (noun)

1. An accepted or professed rule of action or conduct: a person of good moral principles.

2. A fundamental, primary, or general law or truth from which others are derived: the principles of modern physics.

3. A fundamental doctrine or tenet; a distinctive ruling opinion:the principles of the Stoics.

4. Principles, a personal or specific basis of conduct or management: to adhere to one's principles; a kindergarten run on modern principles.

5. Guiding sense of the requirements and obligations of right conduct: a person of principle.
(Dictionary.com, 2011)



Today i tried to say “my innocence continues”.
You should’ve seen the comments and the inbox messages i received afterwards! One said i had amnesia, another said i’m not innocent at all, another one said “yeah right”. The messages were less polite. Two booty calls and one detailing my actions from horrid drinking to sexual adventures. Thanks for noticing! I had no idea i was this…um, random? I wanted to say Bad but that wouldn’t have been the case, there’s worse people than myself out there.
I feel bad about my behaviour lately. Actually all year. Going against most if not all, my principles. I’m not the young naive child people used to know, that wouldn’t have sex randomly, drink and get stupid drunk, believe that boyfriends made the world go round e.t.c. From where i stand, it doesn’t seem like there’s going back! If you read from my very first post to the most recent one, you can actually see i’ve changed. I’m actually a little bit afraid at the direction my life’s taken.

What happened? Well having being brought up in a strict environment and then everything’s made lax, well, all this would happen i suppose. It’s scary, having fun (or my idea of fun) is not good in other people’s eyes. Actually one of those comments that came as a a result of my update felt like a slap in my face. Because it came from someone i truly look up to.
So instead of whining about what a trashy (i think that’s the word i’ve been looking for) person i’ve become, i’m actually doing (or have been doing subconsciously) something about it. I’m a lot less loud than i used to be (even in the bedroom). When i was asked what the matter was and i said “nothing at all, why?” They proceeded to reply “you’re rather quiet”. I hadn’t noticed that until they pointed it out.

“You attract what you exude.”

I can’t remember where i heard that but it’s such an interesting statement! Because it’s entirely true. Basically, it means if you’ve got riff raff behaviour then riff raff people will hang out or be attracted to you, or if you’re smart then smart people will associate themselves with you. It’ll help me in the long run, like a sort of mantra.

I still have the “i don’t give a fuck” attitude in certain areas like material possessions and the like. But when it comes to reputation and what others perceive of me, i take it seriously. I’m not being hard on myself, call this taking corrective action, before it gets any worse! It might mean i go back to being boring and safe but if that’s what makes me sleep well at night then i’d rather be that than a wild person living on edge.
Therefore, instead of saying my innocence continues, the correct term to say would be “fortification of my principles continue…” Oh yes…

|Without you-Mariah Carey|

While i was away

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Bloggers note: I hadn’t posted anything this month, largely due to my absence from any computer (deliberately) while on holiday and writers block syndrome. I did a guest post here though. Enjoy the post!


I’ve returned from my vacation! With a cold.

Malindi SunriseI got a whole week to go down to the coast where there’s sun and heat, and what a vacation it was! I did not drink nor did i go out. I wanted to get away from it all and i did. So what did yours truly get up to?

Sleep: I usually sleep for 6 hours when in the capital, many things like schoolwork/online group work have me up until 11pm, and i’m awake by 5am. At the coast though, i slept for 10 hours every single day! I didn’t go out to clubs nor did i drink myself silly, or at all for that matter. Waking up daily at 9-10am was very refreshing!

Think: I tend to think lots but i never actually give them 2nd thoughts. I had lots of clutter in my head. It was really nice to have time to sit down and think of ways forward! It didn’t even hit me that a whole year elapsed since i walked out the relationship i had with someone, actually on that day i was having a splashing day out in the ocean! Thinking also made me realize that i’m ready to date again! Yes people, i’m willing to play that stupid little game of chasing (albeit being chased), hitting on (read being given the worst pick up lines) and going on dates to fishy places (really, Java’s so impersonal nowadays) and other things.
Not once did i think about uni! Yaey!
I did however, come up with multiple post ideas. Long walks on the beach with that nice sound of the waves crashing on the shore were quite relaxing.

Explore: The Nairobi Java House has “Malindi chai” something something and “Malindi coffee something blah blah”. Basically, they’ve named a coffee/tea after the sweet, largely Italian coastal town of Malindi. I tried it and i didn’t like it! So this was a part of my trip. To visit Malindi and try out Italian cuisine and those coffees and teas. The result? I’m having problems fitting into my trousers! The coffee was to die for! As was the food! I had a very interesting squid and crustacean garden salad…  And the hotel i stayed in was excellent! The staff and locals rap Italian. Very little Swahili spoken. I got to walk to the reef with one hunky tour guide (Tourists please say 10 Euros, i saw one couple pay 40 Euros-a total rip off!) and my nephew. The little one really enjoyed the reef! As did i!
I was in Mombasa as well. It’s basically like another home for me, i know it quite well now. I walked all over the main island, hiked along “Mama Ngina drive” with my friend, ate more food, and mingled with crocodiles! Being the Holy month of Ramadhan i couldn’t eat during the day---it would’ve looked totally bad and unfair/inconsiderate. I would eat indoors. My aunts are always intent on feeding me to the maximum! This is why i cannot fit properly into some pants. More reason to go shopping then! Smile 
I didn’t ride any boats this time. No worries, i’ll do that when next i go!

Lounge: I had my “on beauty” book by Zadie Smith to keep me company. It’s a gripping book! I’ve put it down because i’m about to finish it again. I spent a whole day indoors just resting and reading the book. I amused myself with Phineas and Furb when i wasn’t reading.

Bond: Anybody that knows me well knows i talk lots! I’d chat with my aunts, mingle with my baby cousin and nephew, chat with coastal friends… It was really good! I’m getting more tolerable around small children. Usually, they irritate me which makes me look like an irrate father. But no, when you have two children that actually listen (when they want) to you it makes things easier. It’s hilarious saying “the monster in the drawer will get you, put those back!” on them! It used to be used on me as a child. And before you all scoff at me, yes i’m quite capable of handling children, in fact it scares me at how parent-like i get around them.

During this break, i did run into two of my classmates, and ran into an old crush. Full story at the guest post on Randoms’ blog.
I’m quite ready to face this new semester! It marks the final year of undergrad for me, and it’s going to be utterly busy! This last quarter of the year also tends to be the most drunken one. But i’ll do my best to stay detoxicated.

Meanwhile, i nurse this bastard flu!

|Gypsy- Shakira|

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