Armed with juice and stories, my girlfriend and I embarked on what would be one of the most hilarious parties I've recently attended. First, I felt REALLY awkward being in work clothes and walking around with my work bag (No car to put it in, and I'm not leaving my bag with it's contents unattended). Secondly, there were lots of young, recently out children. Third, Lesbians were the dominant species! Fourth, I had a 2 minute crush on a very boyish, studded lesbian which quickly vanished when his girlfriend appeared. I used "his" deliberately. Fifth and last, I am horrible at picking up guys/ flirting with guys when I'm sober.
Across the dance floor, there was this elegant chap in black who looks very handsome. I told my girlfriend that I found him attractive! She went and did the priceless thing of being wingman and went to chat him up. She gave me the thumbs up and I approached. "Hi, I'm cuppatea, enjoying the party?" I asked. He said yes. I was thinking to myself what a daft line that was whilst tryna come up with the next sentence. A few awkward sentences later I had his number and fled. It's a lot like the scene below.
Later, I was casually walking out the tents to get some fresh air when I meet a friend chatting with one of his friends. "You look edible" the bloke tells me. I was taken aback. In fact I laughed at him, and asked "really?", to which he nodded. I normally would have carried on walking but I stood and listened to what he had to say.
He even made me sit on his lap!
During the cab ride home, I looked at his card and thought about how unpredictable he is. I still haven't called him because, well, I'm shy. What do I say, "Hi?" Oh come on...
ALSO, when sober, I can sneak into the house far more quietly than anyone else in the family.
|Deja Vu - Kenny G|