Ending March: Men


I talked to my ex boyfriend. He hurt me again. Clearly, there’s nothing there anymore! No worries, i was hurt for the best part of 2 minutes. Life continued after, with a joke on ghetto animals. Watch out for the baboons at the Nairobi National park!

I met an old fling (flung? past tense.) I still like him. Society on the other hand, doesn’t. He is enemies with a number of good friends. That means, i cannot date him. or see him. It’s apparently taboo.

There’s someone i’m interested in, and i think we have chemistry. He just wants to be friends with benefits. I’m looking to settle. Its like oil and water. Sigh…

Scary, cold, complicates, arrogant, snobbish. Those words have been used in reference to me. keep them coming, i don’t mind. Not that i mean to be those words but if those are impressions people are getting…

See you next year, March.

|only the young-Brandon Flowers|

My 3am matatu ride home


“kwani ujawai ona matiti? *mssssschheeeeeewwwwww*”  (you’ve never seen breasts?)

Yes this is how my journey home last night from the city at 3am begun! I was abit high and i was waiting on the matatu to get full. The opening statement came from a Tanzanian lady who was so scandalously dressed, and she was HIGH, she had 90% of her cleavage popping out, i could even see abit of the nipple. The Conductor/kange of the matatu was so fixated on them… shaking his head “ghai ghai ghai….(God x3) ” he’d mutter to himself.

Next was a drunk couple. with a bottle of Smirnoff blue label. And their drunk selves. “nataka kumanga vibad!!!”  (i want to eat you so bad) said the drunk woman to her boyfriend. “woi baby baby, tutafika nyumbani saa hii tu halafu tutacheza” (woi baby, we’ll reach home just now then we’ll play) said the drunk boyfriend. And he was good looking mind you! I was smiling to myself clasping my del monte juice in hand. Was tryna sober up… because i wanted to pull off a silent entry into the house. Not successful LOL!

“beba warembo!” (carry the gorgeous ones) the noisy drunk students were shouting. Really, i was in fits of laughter already! “twende Nyumbani na kinde!” (let’s go home with 10bob) one yelled. 10 shillings would have sufficed for us broke students! We still paid 50 shillings though.

Finally at 3.30am the matatu was full, and we left town for home. “eh, makanga, unaangalia nini? we wacha kutangaza matiti zangu! Mbwa!” (conductor what are you looking at, stop watching my breasts! dog!) the Tanzanian lady said in her sonorous singing Swahili dialect. “ni ku-appreciate tu au siyo buda? (i’m just appreciating them, right brother?) he said talking in my direction. i burst out laughing uncontrollably!  “mscheeeeeewww” from the Tanzanian lady.

Now a passenger, a guy, and the conductor got into an argument that stopped the vehicle. The passenger said the conductor robbed him. impossible, the conductor was a row behind him with no access to the seat the guy was on. The passenger got really mad and got out. So did the conductor. And pap, a fight broke out! The driver got out to stop them. Several minutes of threats and loud conversation, we continued our journey….

…To the police station! It’s bloody 4am, i’m sleepy, but no, the driver decides to go to the 5oh to sort the drunk passenger and conductor out! They get out. Make a statement. Loud conversation. The cop comes. “Shida ni nini abiria?” (what’s the problem here passengers?)” he asked. Oh by the way, he was mean looking and plump! oh lord. In my head i was thinking of who to call incase things got a bit nasty and we were all locked up. Yes the cops can take one matter and transform it into everyone being drunk and disorderly (the whole matatu was high—passengers mainly). Luckily, one passenger sober enough thank heavens, told him it was a tussle between the conductor and the passenger. “Mssscheeeeeewwww afande wacha tuende tulale” (officer let us go home and sleep) said the drunk woman behind me. “si shida zetu” (it’s not our problem) she said. A few more rumbles from the passengers. i was quiet. “sawa bas.” (alright then). The driver came back, closed the door and off we went. Drunk passenger and conductor were left at the cop station.

I finally got out at my stop. The Askari (watchman) opened the gate. In my intoxicated state i narrated my ride home. and gave him 20bob for tea in the morning. He’s a cool guy, he lets me in without questioning whoever’s driving in. really, 4.30am is the time he knows i check in LOL! Trying to open the gate quietly.. yeah that didn’t work.

At least i found my bed without effortlessly this time…

p.s commend me now for writing in Swahili! I think my spellings are correct lol!

|first train home-Imogen Heap|

Deux Conversations


Me: “I can’t sleep”.

Him: “why? talk to me.”

Me: “ever since you sent that text my mind has been occupied with thoughts of you, i don’t know why…i just feel so…”

Him: “woah! go easy on a guy lol!" I won’t lie, i miss you too. i treasure you deeply. Looks like we’ll need to meet up.”

Me: “indeed… Meanwhile, back to my problem, i can’t sleep LOL!”

Him: “i don’t mean to sound perverse, but wank. it helps. Smile with tongue out guys sleep nicely after Winking smile

Me: OMG tigawana! Smile with tongue out stop being silly. Only if you’re the one doing it to me Smile with tongue out

Him: “hahaha, why not. I still look at your pictures everyday btw…"

Me: “for real? i think talking to you was all i needed…Smile i can sleep now…

Him: “Okay, you sleep nicely handsome. I miss you. xoxoSecret telling smile

Me: sleep well mister! hugs Secret telling smile


Who was i talking to? And then, this other conversation happened in uni when i was chatting with some mates. FOR REAL!

Him: “so how’ve you been?”

Me: “For the 4th time, i’m well! Smile you’ve asked that four times, do i make you nervous or something?”

Him: “oh you know it’s been a while since last we met, years actually..” *scratches head nervously.* “yes you do.”

Me: “well, you don’t need to, i’m actually nice. I Think. Smile

Friend B: “Christ ask him out on a date already!”

Me: “WOOT!”

Him: “would you like to go on a date with me?”

Me: “omg you just can’t do that friend B it’s so random *splutters words etc* it’s just OMG!

Him: “i’m serious, we go on a date?”

Me: “aaaaaaiiiii i, i, i, i but it’s so omg, wait i, friend B really?”

Friend B: “He says yes.”

Me: “Alright fine, yes.”

Him: “Seriously? you’re serious?” *smiles sheepishly*

Me: “yes. Really!”

Him: “but you used to be so stone cold”.

Me: “um, yeah i grew up Smile

Him: “wow. Okay what’s your number?”


Speechless much? Just like me.

|hold it against me-Britney Spears|

Rainy conversation: ''don't do that''.

It's raining. Praise be! My ISP's down! Damn.

I have a gay friend who tells me nearly all the time ''don't do that''. What is it i shouldn't do? According to him, i shouldn't sit how i normally sit because "it's ''gay'' and it'll out everyone.''. I shouldn't speak the way i do, because ''it's gay and it'll out me or my company''. I shouldn't use my hands gestures when speaking because ''its so girly, it's gay and it'll out you''.

At this rate I'm even afraid to breathe! What, even how i breathe is gay and will out me?

He's always tryna change who i am. ''to fit in, not everyone likes how you behave''. He said. And he's always imposing and insisting on issues. Just yesterday he insisted i was tired. When i wasn't.

What does one do with such a person?

Character and personality make up an individual. Sure i tend to speak in jargon when it comes to certain topics, i analyze people, i zone out when in conversation with people, i speak to myself, i don't follow fashion, i construct sentences oddly... fine i get it, i'm abit weird compared to the usual individual...

...But that's no reason to try and "adjust" me. If you can't tolerate me then don't. Go find that perfect gay company that behaves how you want them to.

I'm comfortable being who i am thanks...

St Patrick’s day 2011 (HD)


cloverleafTrust the Irish to have come up with such a holiday during Lent! St. Patrick was the most recognized saint in Ireland. Today’s his death anniversary. Normally, people go to church, then fest in the afternoon on bacon and cabbage (according to Irish tradition) with wine and malt, and lots of dance!

I even dressed appropriately in green and black…

But for me, today was an interesting day. I saw life in HD! “High Definition!” I swear i’ll stop when uni’s over. How a high lasts a few hours i’ve no idea. But with regard to the Irish, friends and i kept tradition on! We made merry, by hanging out trying out chocolate flavoured things (this is why i saw life in HD) feasting (that chicken burger! the cappuccino after was amazing) and being happy in general—spreading Irish luck and cheer! I even rode the train today. In the rain. Train in the rain! Fun!

The high wore off in evening class. It’s like a sugar high for me, i’ve got so much energy then after i burn out and feel tired!

Anyhoo, cheers to St. Paddy, i hope you all made merry! Lord knows i did…

P.s, On the way to intoxication with the 3 girlfriends, this guy was looking at me like i was the luckiest bastard in the world, going into a room with 3 women. If he only knew i was gay LOL! even if you put 5 naked women in a room i’ll feel nothing… #imjustsaying

|Liquor Store Blues-Bruno Mars ft. Damian Marley|

Friendship Saturday


Good company and lots of ice-cream’s a brill way of lightening up a somewhat bleh week! Okay and abit of booze hihi…

I met up with emo, he looks the same. He’s one of the few souls who goes abroad and don’t come back with their culture and impose it on everyone else… It’s so good to have him around! We had lunch with him at java (omg their chicken salad is SO GOOD) and then we ran into one of my most fashionable friends! He’s a model. And he causes havoc on the streets with his dressing. Just the other day he nearly made a driver of a bmw almost drive into the rear of a matatu, because the driver was staring too much at us. He was rocking super clingy skinnies. Okay and he’s very good looking! And just yesterday, girls of a certain high school, of which i shan’t say (STATE HOUSE GIRLS) were cat calling, very loudly on Kenyatta avenue in their trashy old school bus, “fags on the street, fags on the street!” Bitches. We ignored them lol! He showed me this shop that has everything from (very genuine) prada, gucci, zara, diesel etc (but those prices!) where he gets his wear from. I have never been victimized by fashion like that in my life! If i had income, that is to say, if i weren’t a house-hold net borrower, i would own that shop! Such fabulous things inside…

Another friend of mine bought me blueberry ice-cream whilst we were waiting on A to come. We were just going to chill at his place and catch up. There was a football match where Manchester united swept the floor with Arsenal! Good comeback.. I have discovered that Gin and Robinsons goes fabulously well! It is very easy to finish a 750 of Gilbeys with that juice!

It rained a little last night, i think the rains are finally on their way. Speaking of Nature, you know how unreal it was seeing the Tsunami in Japan happening live on telly? It was such terrifying scene! Nature is unbelievably powerful…

Maybe this coming week will be a better one.

|I surrender-Clare Maguire|

week of lament. Or just hell really.


Plastic university friends, sulkings, interventions, homecomings, gate crashings, skivings… it’s been a strangely weird week.

I’m starting to hate uni like the way i hated high school. Not because of the education, but because of the people! I have beef with 3 people, 2 gay guys and a girl. The girl told me “don’t be that person”. She also called me a hypocrite. Because i’m not as girly/sassy as the other 2 gays. So that gives you reason to be quite nasty innit? All this coming, the day my bag straps cut and my shoes decided to laugh. by laugh i mean split a (big) seam. I’ve had such an angry week, it’s not good for my heart.

So Monday, It would have been better if i didn’t remember that it would have marked a year had that arse and i lasted that long. I had to read my older posts to remind myself that things weren’t good. No trust, lies and other things. Hey i’m human too, much as i look ahead, i have to look back, to remind myself not to make such a mistake again. I didn’t tell him anything though. I’m not like other ex boyfriends that remind you there was something. I just…continue. He probably forgot anyways.

Interventions in the name of M. He knows small p and i don’t talk. Guy defended small p. Naturally my arguments didn’t seem that reasonable to him. Lawyers. Naturally he said he did but i could see otherwise. Fine, i’ve put everything behind me. When you two read this i’ll be as calm as a deep water lake in summer. Forgive and forget, that’s how the system works innit?

Emo is home! for a while. Fun times ahead.

I might have skived class yesterday evening to go have coffee with Mr. man and my school friend (who seems to becoming a good friend). I told my friend Mr.man likes him. My friend seems to think he and i can work again. I’ve never heard of exes working things out and reuniting in this society! Someone prove me wrong.

There’s another concert this month that i’ve rsvp’d for! Perhaps i should find a date?

The best song that describes me at this point is “feeling’s gone” By Basement Jaxx.

My life continues…

A post!


Less is more!

  • sigh, i was (i think i still am) stoned on Dutch cookies! It has been a challenge not to behave like a dumbass! or say stupid things. tihihi?
  • Helping friends move house! I’m all alone in my area now, i’ll have to be sleeping at my friends places, they live a distance (a big one) away from me.
  • School this week should be easy paced, so tired of frantic weeks!
  • do you know how hard its been typing this post? sleep’s coming in waves! clap for me yaey!

|that song by Dido|

Lessons: #2 P.Y.T (pretty young thing) but uninterested


P.Y.T’s a song by Michael Jackson (RIP).

Lesson number two:

No matter how attractive/hot/gorgeous/pretty/stunning you are, sometimes some people just won’t be interested in you! For many reasons, like personality incompatibility, temperaments, tastes e.t.c. So please, don’t take it the wrong way or make it your lifes mission to make the person you want, but is not interested in you like/love/date you. Breaking up his/her life so that they give attention is wrong. It just won’t work plus you’re wasting your time! And hurting people. For real.

Don’t feel offended that the person doesn’t want you, it’s just the way it is.

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